Are you living your life purpose — or still searching? Day 4

Now this a challenging question.

Growing up as a Gen X first generation kid of immigrant South American/Caribbean parents, my “purpose” was to fulfill the expectations set for me without question.

Our household rules were unspoken and simple:

Stay out of trouble. Get good grades and be on the honor role. Don’t ever ask about going to sleepovers, school trips “away” or going to a friend’s house to “hang out”. You can be a doctor or lawyer – choose one. And as a daughter, I had a bunch more rules to follow.

It took an embarrassingly long time to realize that I was not living my life purpose but better late than never, right?

So I don’t feel that I have a “defined” life purpose.

For the time being, my “purpose” is to return to the self I always was but never had a chance to know and to rediscover the things that give me joy.

That is my life purpose for now.

Are you living your life purpose or are you still searching?

Join in on this March challenge.

Do you believe in magic? When have you felt it? Day 3

I believe in different types of “magic” unrelated to witchcraft and abracadabras.

I believe that the “power of words” and the “power of thoughts” (like affirmations) can make things happen in your life that can feel “like magic”.

Like the times I’ve dreamed of someone I haven’t thought about in a very long time and suddenly they called me out of the blue…

Or the time I wanted a sun shelter for my deck, no store had my size and I wasn’t about to order one for $120 that late in the season. Weeks later, while doing an errand at a store I rarely go, there laying near the entrance was a “returned” sun shelter in my size and on liquidation for $20…

For me, those incidents were like “magic”.

Or the rare occasions that I’ve met someone with whom I’ve had a total authentic “vibe” and felt comfortable around almost right away.

Or the time I wrote about here when there was a surreal connection between me and a stranger.

Those are kind of “magic” too.

And for me, “magic” can be as simple as sipping on a hot cup of coffee, watching the waves roll onto the beach and feeling at peace sitting in my favorite spot in my favorite place…

Do you believe in magic?

Join in on this March challenge.

Do you have any irrational fears? Day 2

Spiders.

No matter how small.

On my bedroom ceiling.

Especially if I notice one before going to bed.

There is no way that I will ever fall asleep with a spider in my bedroom.

This fear is totally irrational because I’m not a squeamish person.

I have no problem handling a dead mouse in a trap or scooping out the occasional unfortunate animal that falls into the pool.

But if I really think about it, this gif below is what I am REALLY afraid of whenever I’m trying to kill a spider that is on a ceiling…

Don’t laugh – this is scary as hell.

What is your most irrational fear?

Join in on this March challenge.

What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received? March 1 Day 1

It wasn’t the “best” compliment I have ever gotten but it was the best “foot-in-mouth” compliment…

“You’re intelligent, gorgeous and you have a head on your shoulders. If I didn’t already have a girlfriend…”

The voice caught me by surprise. I was leaving my room to meet up with a few classmates for dinner and when I looked around, Paul was leaning against his door frame with his arms crossed. He was taking me in from head to toe with a twinkle in his eye.

As the resident advisor on the dorm floor, Paul was a friendly guy and you had to be if you were dealing with excitable first year students living away from the watchful eyes of their parents for the first time, doing whatever and whoever they wanted.

Paul was my dorm “neighbor”. His door was always open for student drop-ins and because my room was the size of a closet and I was semi-claustrophobic, I kept mine open even when studying which meant that we chatted a lot. Being older than the others (he was doing a master’s and I was only living on-campus during my 2nd degree out of convenience because home was too far away) we had lots of intellectual conversations, joked around, debated about current events and things unrelated to university life like our opposite tastes in music.

Paul was a smart and good-looking guy but since the only thing on my mind was completing that degree and getting out of that boring city, I had my Teflon armor on and wasn’t about to be distracted by anyone or anything, no matter how enticing.

“Ok, Paul,” I decided to bite. “Go ahead and finish that sentence. If you didn’t already have a girlfriend…what would you do?”

Did I mention that Paul was one of those flirty flirt kind of guys?

I leaned against my closed door, crossed my arms and waited.

“I would ask you out in a heartbeat.” He grinned and was just about to say something else when suddenly his bottle-blond girlfriend popped up behind him and stared us both down.

If looks could kill…

It was obvious from the look of horror on Paul’s face that he had completely forgotten that she had been in his room the entire time.

Out of sight and way out of mind.

As she stormed off, I felt a little sorry for him but definitely not for her.

You see, each and every time I would bump into her in the hallway (which was all the time even when Paul wasn’t there and though she didn’t even live in the dorm), she would never respond to my greetings of “hello”. Most of the time she ignored me and after a while, I simply ignored her right back. I had never even had a conversation with the girl. I simply chalked up her attitude to being immature (I think she was 19), a lack of basic manners and Becky-like behaviors long before the term “Becky” became an insult.

I couldn’t help myself and laughed. “Wow. I’m not sure how you’re going to fix that…”

After a few minutes, he shrugged and broke the ice.

“Well…now that I don’t have a girlfriend…. He paused and let his words hang in the air.

I laughed and purposely left his words hanging.

“Paul?”

“Yes?”

“I’m late for dinner,” I said and left him standing there.

I decided to take his “flub” as a compliment since he forgot all about his girlfriend because of me. 🙂

What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?

Join in on this March challenge.

And the challenge begins…

I won’t fool you…

I’m totally surprised that I’m actually 100% prepared for the March writing challenge I talked about here.

I have Sandra over at What Sandra Thinks to thank for my preparedness.

When she told me how she had ideas for each and every March question, I was like…DAMN! I had better get my act together.

So, I’m ready.

I’m even going to post my March 1 post a day early as a reminder to those who said they would join in with me.

You know who you are…*hint hint* 🙂

If you are joining in by answering the questions on your own blog, please pingback to me so that I can visit your post. And if you don’t post on your own blog, feel free to answer the question in my comment box.

I hope you enjoy this month’s posts to get to know me a little better.

See you in the comments!

The A to Z Challenge in April? Maybe…

From one March challenge into an April challenge?

Maybe.

I have written some pretty decent stories in past A to Z Challenges.

I would love to take a stab at it again this year but I can’t think of a theme to base myself on. And I need a theme before I can even start choosing 26 words to accompany each post.

Of course, if I were to participate, it would have to be fiction-based and brief writings to keep up.

I like the idea of writing letters to someone based on the A to Z alphabet because I’ve seen other writers do this so well but if you have any ideas or words to toss out at me, feel free.

By the way, I wrote “If My Wounds Were Visible” during an A to Z Challenge and you can read it here.

Theme ideas and/or words please! 🙂

“If My Wounds Were Visible” #fiction

I’m throwing you back to one of my old A to Z Challenge fiction projects.

I wrote one letter of its’ alphabet for 26 nights straight and though it was a hard write and it’s still in its original draft, I’m proud of it.

“If My Wounds Were Visible” is a project that I would like to rewrite into a non-diary style because I would like to focus on more dialogue within the story.

Before you read “If My Wounds Were Visible”, I need to provide a TRIGGER WARNING because this story speaks to domestic abuse, rape and a few other difficult subject matters.

I have tried my best to place trigger warnings at the beginning of certain installments where I feel they are appropriate but everyone is different so feel free to stop if you feel triggered.

And if you are a survivor, you may want to skip this story in its entirety.

Here is the link again – If My Wounds Were Visible .