Don’t Feel Me Up #fiction #fictionfriday

Just leave me the hell alone.

You outstretch your nasty hands, touch me without asking, sometimes even go so far as to squeeze me. And when you do, it is always way too hard.

What the f*** is that all about?

Look, I understand that it’s Friday afternoon and that you are on your way home. I see that bottle of wine in your hand that you are going to pop open the moment you get home and slip into something a little more comfortable. You would like to start your weekend off right and taking me home would do the trick.

You could break me off. Piece. By. Piece.

Because I know I’m hot.

I looked enticing enough for you to approach me in the first place, right? Especially when I’m sitting here among all of these less traditional options.

But then, you have the nerve to tell me that I’m not hot enough for you to take home…

Fine. Like I said, just leave me the hell alone.

You aren’t the first person who has groped me this afternoon and you won’t be the last.

Someone will be forced to take me home if I am the only one left here before the shop closes.

I must admit, I am very, very guilty of groping a baguette or two on a Friday afternoon. πŸ™‚Β 

All Rights Reserved Β©2015 Marquessa Matthews.

Note: On a typical Montreal Friday afternoon, many commuters taking the train or bus back to the suburbs -grab a bottle of wine from the SAQ (liquor store), some cheese (Brie, Camembert) and stand in line at their favorite bakery for a baguette or pastries to take home for the weekend…#Montreal!

Β 

baguette

Photo credit: Julie70 / Foter / CC BY-NC-SA

Β©2016 Marquessa Matthews. All Rights Reserved.

Originally posted on August 6, 2015.

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40 thoughts on “Don’t Feel Me Up #fiction #fictionfriday

    1. …when it’s straight out of the oven at the bakery and you don’t wait to get the car before taking a bite…and don’t realize (or care) that you have all the little crumbs stuck to your lips…πŸ˜†

      Liked by 2 people

  1. Beautifully executed, as always, Marquessa. I have to say this peak on the “other side of the bakery window” has a decidedly “feminist” quality — not that that’s a bad thing. It definitely put me in mind of a very different venue, where very different items were “on offer” — being a man, I suppose that’s only natural — and one you probably didn’t (or maybe you did) intend. (Just one criticism. I think it would have been better without the “spoiler” line: “Because you could break me off. Piece, By. Piece.” It would have been more “impactful” to carry the illusion (allusion?) all the way to the end and your explanation. But that’s just me.) Nice piece. It made me think. And isn’t that the whole point? -S-

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Lol! I actually did intend for the male vs. diva perspective…And for the “break me off” phrase, I won’t explain the “double entendre”…I’ll let you google that term to see what else that means…😈☺

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      1. Just googled “break me off ” So glad I’m not up on rap/hip-hop jargon. This phrase certainly explains a lot about the “de-volution” of male/female relationships, I think

        Liked by 1 person

        1. I am not a fan of rap either but now this phrase because I kept hearing it, guessed what it meant in the context of certain songs but actually had to google it be sure. My kind of rap was the early 1980s when the lyrics had meaningful messages (to me at least). Long gone are the days of The Sugar Hill Gang in 1979!

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  2. I like the post, but I don’t get what you’re feeling the baguettes for. I understand testing pears, or avocados, or any fruit, but what are you testing bread for?

    Is this something I should be doing?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. πŸ˜† In addition to being a tongue in cheek piece, if you look closely, please feel for the softness of the crust and if it just came out of the oven (heat). If either of those are not “right”, people don’t buy them.

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      1. Oh, OK. That’s not what I look for when I buy bread, but I think you’re using the baguettes differently than I would anyway. (I got the tongue-in-cheek thing, that’s what I liked)

        Liked by 1 person

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