All I needed were two duplicate keys made at Home Depot and this is my somewhat funny story…
It is the equivalent to 35 degrees Celsius outside, I’m dripping in sweat, not looking my best and a little annoyed that I can’t find a soul to help me in the store. Granted, it is about 20 minutes to closing before the store shuts for the long weekend but I need to get ,my duplicates made asap. The only worker I can find is a guy sitting in the Window and Doors section in conversation with another client.
When he is free, I approach him, jingle my keys and ask him in French if there is anyone around who can make doubles of my house keys.
(Believe me, I was not looking like this girl below).
He smiles and says, “Yes, I can definitely help you with that.”
The guy pushes back from his desk, stands up, stands up and stands up some more…
He is at least 6’7, if not taller. All I know is that my neck hurts looking up at him.
He is sooooo tall that I find myself saying, “Oh my God, can you be any taller?” out loud and in English.
I blame a mini heat stroke for letting my inside head voice escape my lips and hope that he doesn’t understand English. I’m not that lucky.
He laughs, takes my keys away and says that if he had been an inch or two taller, he could have had a career in basketball or football.
We chit chat about plans for the holiday weekend as he starts up the key making machine. That’s when I realize that he’s not using one of those “do-it-yourself kiosk” thingamabobs where you simply stand back and the machine does everything on its own.
I joke around and tell Mr. Home Depot that he had better replicate the keys properly because I rarely frequent Home Depot and if he doesn’t do a good job, I will come back and hunt him down to blame him. He looks down at me, smiles and proceeds to say, “Well, what’s wrong with that? I wouldn’t mind you coming back to look for me. I wouldn’t mind that at all…”
Though I’m still semi-delirious from the heat, I’m not delirious enough to miss what Mr. Home Depot is doing and neither is the old dude in the aisle standing nearby. Old Dude turns to chuckle at Mr. Home Depot before saying, “Flirty flirt flirt” under his breath. Then Old Dude smirks and goes back to looking for a box of screws on the shelf and minding his own business.
I counter Mr. Home Depot’s smile with my own and say, “Are you saying that you would purposely screw up my keys just so that I come back here looking for you? That’s not nice.”
He says nothing as he finishes off the process. Then, he hands me all my keys, smiles even wider, his eyes laughing at me.
“I’m not saying anything at all. I guess that you’ll just have to wait until you get home to see if I’m nice…or naughty. It’s not like you would be locked out of your house or anything. You still have the originals…”
I don’t have an opportunity to “read” him because the intercom announces that the store is closing. And it’s a good thing because I have no energy for witty flirty repartee left in my sweaty body so I simply ask, “You’re kidding with me right now…right? These keys will work, won’t they?”
Mr. Home Depot shrugs his shoulders and cocks his head to the side. “Maybe…maybe not. Have yourself a great Canada Day weekend.”
I don’t look back at him as I head to the counter to pay $10 for keys that might not even work when I get home…
Tell me if you think Mr. Home Depot was naughty or nice.
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