This is my list of the top ten things I learned before I was 10 and then spent years trying to unlearn:
1. You can’t be smart and pretty at the same time – make a choice and move on;
2. Only blond-haired blue-eyed girls are pretty;
3. Everyone else’s feelings are more important than yours;
4. When you share your passion for something and you’re laughed at for it, don’t ever “share” again;
5. You’re a geek if you enjoy reading lots of books or prefer books to “hanging out” doing nothing with people;
6. If someone has negative things to say about you, believe them because it must be true;
7. When your instincts tell you that a situation doesn’t feel right, keep it to yourself;
8. Do what is expected and you will eventually learn to live with it;
9. Crying is a sign of total weakness that gets you nowhere – just suck it up; and
10. If you do the same thing over and over again, maybe you’ll get a different result.
What were some of the “truths” you tried to unlearn as an adult?
©2015 Marquessa Matthews. All Rights Reserved.
Oh, Marquessa, I learned some of those same lessons. Hopefully you’ve gotten rid of all the lies!!
Melinda
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Oh yes I have Melinda! 🙂
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Oh, good!
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A lot of this list! So true to life!
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Thanks! I also loved your list!
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Very well said. I wonder if many other women can relate to these things that need to be unlearned. I sure do! Great post.
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Thanks for reading Kathy!
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Very nice things Melissa 🙂
Anand
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LOL – its Marquessa! ☺ And thanks!
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Oh, I am so sorry Marquessa 🙂
Best Wishes,
Anand 🙂
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No worries Anand!
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Alright 🙂 Thanks!
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So many items on your list ended up resonating with me. Sometimes you learn these things because someone overtly says then but oftentimes it’s what you see and experience during those early years are subtle, and the subtly enter your mind and become ingrained.
I didn’t realise that until a few months ago. And it’s genuinely sad. But I’m glad I’m getting the chance -little by little- to unlearn what I regarded as true.
So I thank you for writing this and for reminding me that we are not alone on this journey of self-love and self-discovery.
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Thank you so much for reading and yes the journey can sometimes seem long but we are much better for it! 🙂
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Amen!
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Exactly. Some of them I had experienced as well. Especially 3,4,6, and 9. Those experiences are made us stronger. Thanks for sharing.
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Thanks for reading!
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I’m sure you’ve proven most of the so called truths to be very wrong!
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That is part of the journey through life, right? Deciphering what is really truth, perception, reality…:)
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I like your take on the list Marquessa. I can certainly relate to some of those awful situations. Glad we learned later that they were all rubbish! 🙂
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Age brings wisdom!
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Yes, thankfully 🙂
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Your take is hilarious I see why you picked my #10 i see a BFF alliance coming soon lol. Enjoyed ur post.
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So do I! 🙂
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We all had these stereotypes when we were younger
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I recognise every lesson, unfortunately. Excellent post!
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Similar experiences…
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I really believed I was ugly.
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The untruths we used to tell ourselves…
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One myth that I have uncovered, but it has literally taken me 35 years to believe it-Your parents are always right, and you will turn out just like them.
Another one-If you don’t share the same view as your parents it must be wrong…I loved your take on this assignment Marquessa, warmly, Nicole
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Thanks for reading! 😃
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Wow you have a great memory! I didn’t remember what i have learned before 10 and need to unlearned now. This list had definitely got me thinking.
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It wasn’t hard to remember the things you have managed to overcome!
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Agreed Marquessa. Each one.
My addition – all people older than you are always right and should be respected, regardless of the fact that you’ve learned more from the sweet-bitter experiences of life in your early years on the earth than the older person would’ve learned in entire life!
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Oh my, that is indeed another….
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Hola! I liked your post very much! When I was 7-8 yrs old, I used to think that everyone else has got a face which has been developed to some extent whereas I was in the way of it’s development. I used to think that I don’t look so good whereas the others did! But now, people call me cute! So, that’s enough for me to not trust those thoughts. LOL 😀
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Great list.. it’s so relatable!! 😉
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Thank you so much!
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Love the list! Very creative…and relatable
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Thank you for reading!
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Ah that made me laugh. I knew I had a twin sister somewhere!
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😊
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Marquessa, thanks for your like on “Split Second…” and for giving me a chance for more time with you by following. See you are also in writing101. I’ll keep up with your writings.
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See you there!
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This is very inspiring! I’ve learned something new today 🙂
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Thanks for reading! 🙂
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I believe I fell for all ten of those before I was ten, too! So sad. I got over it. I read a book every few days and I do not feel like a geek anymore. I’m glad you are moving on. Thanks for liking my post, “No Matter Where You Go, You are Always There.”
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Sad , yes but it made us stronger, didn’t it?
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What a thoughtful post. So many I can relate to…with 5 siblings, my parents labeled each of us early. We could be smart, pretty, sociable, athletic, funny, loving, but were not supposed to cross those lines. We all fought to acquire the traits of each other, just to prove them wrong. So interesting, thanks. 💕
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In some ways we have all had similar experiences. Thanks for reading!💕
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I have forgotten right now! Which is extremely dangerous: it means they are deeply hidden in my subconsciousness – or beyond.
Juan María.
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Or maybe you have forgotten because you have overcome them! Cheers!
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That would be nice. ❤
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So happy you are unlearning them!! 🙂
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💖
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Great post!💯
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Thank you Miss B!
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Your welcome, dear 💋😀
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Hey! Hope you are doing fine! I have nominated you for the Mystery Blogger Award!
https://akprowling.wordpress.com/2017/07/05/i-won-an-award/
Love,
Anjali
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Thanks so much AK! You’ve made me smile! 🙂
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Only straight long hair is beautiful. Took years to “unlearn” this!
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I remember that one. Long silky Crystal Gayle hair that would sway from side to side…I admire all the beauties out there that are rockin’ the natural hair. 🙂
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Yessss!
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Ha! Our lists are identical! Also, 11. your voice doesn’t matter.
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Your #11 and my #3 are so interlinked! Amazing how we have different experiences but have the same base ‘untruths’…🤔
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Right! And you gotta spend sometimes a lifetime to unlearn the damage
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Almost a lifetime…almost…
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This is such a great yet sad list! I can relate to so many of them.
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Love this Sis and ABSOLUTELY we all have something to unlearn. Rejoicing right along with you💫e
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Thank you E!💜
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This list really is so much relatable to me..
It threw me back in the time, when i was too much sensitive and every single negative statement was like a stone to me.
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I hear you!
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