On January 22, 2022, my Dad died. My theme, “Letters to my Dad” is based on random thoughts about him and the aftermath of not having him around anymore.
Don’t worry, I didn’t give up on writing to you. 🙂
As you already know, I had to put a “pause” on things because you left me here to deal with unheavenly earthly day-to-day stuff while you are living it up in the great beyond, with all those all-you-can-eat beachside buffets with classic salsa playing loudly in the background.
I can almost hear you laugh and say, “Girl, I’m already dead. Don’t worry about me – I’m “good good”. Do what you need to do!”
I can say one thing…
I’m not much happier but at least the happier and funnier times are filling my brain more than the sad ones.
I find myself smiling more whenever I walk into a grocery store and see the stacks of papayas, cantalopes, plaintains, and cassavas because those were always the first things on the grocery lists you would give me.
I chuckle every time I go to the market and pass the smelly fish aisle. I used to give you such a hard time about cooking “real” fish (yeah, the ones with the gross beady bulging eyes) while I complained about the house smelling like an outdoor market down South.
And the odd occasion I’ve heard “All I Wanna Do” since you left, I grin from ear to ear and sing along in my most out-of-key voice because that is what we used to do on those 2 hour car rides back in the ’90s when you would drive me home from school for the weekends. We never talked about it but deep down, I think you knew that I wasn’t very happy about my studies and just wanted to help me get away from the pressure, even if was only for 48 hours.
Remember how we would crank open the windows of the old stationwagon and purposely sing the wrong words to that song and many others every Friday and Sunday afternoon? For years after that, you used to hum the song just to make me laugh and remember.
Dad, thank you for leaving me with so many good thoughts that I can always be nostalgic about.
Loving you always,