Willy Wonka And The Baby Factory

I’m minding my own business and doing my thing on the beach. But I can’t help overhearing a conversation between a small group of men sitting nearby having a “good old boys” time.

Like so many who fly down to PR just for the weekend, it’s clear that these “boys” are in town to party and that the Medalla drinking and cigar puffing is part of the pre-party festivities.

My ears perk up when one of the men starts talking about his latest baby momma. I try not to judge people but I can’t help myself with him.  It’s clear that the children he has are from multiple women and that he sees it as some kind of warped badge of honor.

I’m already rolling my eyes behind my sunglasses but my eyes bug out when he says, “I tell you man, these females are sooo tricky. Always getting themselves pregnant so that they can trap you into paying for them.”

Females?

Always getting themselves pregnant?

Paying for them?

I take a closer look at him and truly wonder what woman in her right mind would let him within 10 feet of her whooha but to each her own taste.

I text a friend to share my judgmental thoughts and almost die with laughter at her response:

“Total loser! If he chose not to cover his d*** before he did the deed, the only asshole to blame is himself. He probably Willy Wonka’ed some poor girl who was too young to know better.”

Me:

“Are you watching Charlie and the Chocolate Factory again?”

Friend:

“Yup. It’s part of a Johnny Depp movie marathon on tv. How did you know?”

Me:

“Just a good guess.”

All Rights Reserved ©2017 Marquessa Matthews

 

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#TravelTuesday: I Wear My Sunglasses At Light

I’m guilty.

The only time I wear sunglasses is when I’m on the beach and my reasons have nothing to do with the glare of the sun, UV rays and eye protection. Wearing sunglasses has everything to do with people watching.

I don’t mean in a creepy stalker kind of way like the guy in this post. I’m talking about the not-so-obvious, perfectly sneaky way to observe people’s interactions, body language and conversations that are within earshot. And no one is really the wiser if you do it the right way.

Sunglasses on, nose in book and ears wide open.

The kind of “observing” that gets your imagination going, leads you to make up stories about the people you see and try to decipher the relationships between them…the stuff begs questions like:

How is it that this mother and daughter have matching plastic surgery?

Mother and daughter with matching plastic surgery All Rights Reserved ©2017 Marquessa Matthews

What secrets are these two lovers keeping from each other?

What secrets are they keeping from each other? All Rights Reserved ©2017 Marquessa Matthews

What’s the story behind this woman’s back tattoo?

Why did she get that tattoo? All Rights Reserved ©2017 Marquessa Matthews

Who was sipping on this coconut before they abandoned it?

Whose coconut was this and how did it get here? All Rights Reserved ©2017 Marquessa Matthews

Yes, I am guilty of wearing my sunglasses to seek out ideas when I’m on the beach.

But as a writer, YOU are guilty too.

Whether it’s on the beach, while sitting in a coffeeshop, at the hair salon or on the train…

I know that you do it too because as writers, we observe, ponder, imagine and create tales.

The question is, “Who’s watching you?”

Images and content ©2017 Marquessa Matthews. All Rights Reserved.

Disclaimer: I have no copyrights to the song and/or video and/or hyperlinks to songs and/or videos and/or gifs above. No copyright infringement intended.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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#TravelTuesday: Stories Under The Sun #beach #vacation

Carolina Beach, Puerto Rico ©2017 Marquessa Matthews. All Rights Reserved.

It boggles my mind when I hear people say that they don’t like the beach or vacationing.

What?! Who are these people?! 😉

If you happen to be one of those people, you may want to skip the next few #TravelTuesdays.

Not only will I likely post random vacation photos from my IG, I’ll probably post a few of my “vacation stories”.

In the meantime, close your eyes and don’t look at this video I posted last year… 🙂

Image and video content ©2017 Marquessa Matthews. All Rights Reserved.

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