#MondayBlogs – “The Call of the Wind” #fiction @mondayblogs

Tap, tap and delete!

A lesson for on how to treat yourself as a priority when your significant is choosing to make you an option.

Photo credit: Tamara Álvarez via Foter.com / CC BY-NC-ND

The Call of the Wind

“You’re a great girl but I…uh… just don’t want to be “exclusive” right now. I mean, I’m not ready for anything serious at this point in time. You understand that, don’t you?”

It was a Friday night and Lily was curled up next to me on the couch watching a movie on Netflix. From out of left field, Lily had popped the topic, taking me by surprise. Well, it wasn’t that far out of left field – we had been seeing each other regularly for months.

I braced myself for her reaction and the anger that would probably follow.

I felt Lily’s body stiffen and her cheek left where it had been gently resting against my chest. She sat up with a frown but it quickly vanished. Lily hesitated before speaking.

“Oh, uh…okay. I understand.”

I watched as she managed to smile and I was simply relieved that she wasn’t pissed.

Lily was always cool. Then again, she was Lily and unlike any other girl I had ever dated. Independent, stable in every sense of the word, kind and caring all rolled up into one amazing, petite package. I really, really liked her but when I realized that I could easily fall for her, I decided to take a step back. I needed to keep my options open, just in case. You know what I mean, right?

I sat up and grabbed my beer that sat next to her green tea on the coffee table.

“Babe, I’m blown away that you’re not mad. Wow, you are one in a million.”

Lily smiled at the compliment and grabbed her cell from the coffee table. I watched her scroll through her screen, press a few buttons and then drop the cell into her purse.

“Who texted you?”

Lily always ignored her cell when we were together so I was curious since I hadn’t heard it vibrate.

“Oh, no one texted me.”

“So what were you checking on your cell?”

“Nothing. I was deleting you from my contacts.”

Lily’s voice was so matter of fact that I wasn’t sure if I had heard her correctly.

“What?”

I was confused as she pushed herself up off the couch, got up and started gathering her things.

“Where are you going? You just said that you were fine with not being exclusive…”

Lily nodded as she draped her purse over her shoulder and folded her coat over her arm.

“Matt, I am fine with you not wanting to be exclusive. We’ve been dating for seven months now. We’ve even met each other’s families. But if you’re still sitting on the fence about me, that means that I’m not the right one for you.”

My heart beat fast and panic traveled through my body. My mind raced back to our second date when my car had broken down and we had gotten stranded in the middle of nowhere for hours waiting for a tow truck. Lily never even complained once when we were forced to eat at a dive bar next to the repair shop while we waited. She had taken it all in stride like water off a duck’s back.

Lily was also the one who had brought me homemade soup and stopped by to check on me every day when I had the flu and thought I was going to die. When everyone else had avoided me and my nasty germs, Lily had been fearless. She was always so easy, free flowing, drama-free. And I really loved being with her.

One word described Lily and it was “amazing”.

“No, no, no! Wait, it’s not that you’re not the right girl for me. It’s just that …”

“Matt, you don’t need to explain,” Lily interrupted calmly. “I appreciate that you’re telling me this now. It’s better for me to know sooner than later. I thought that we had something good but I guess that it was one-sided. I need a man who appreciates me, a man who knows a great catch when he sees one. But that is clearly not you.”

The sharp pain in my chest was a telltale sign that I had made a huge, huge mistake.

“Please don’t go! I do want to be take things to the next level with you in the future…”

Lily leaned down and kissed me on the forehead – the kiss of death. Her gesture silenced me

“The future was now Matt. I hope that you find what you’re looking for. Take care of yourself.”

Glued to the couch with second thoughts, I watched Lily disappear through my front door as if she’d heard the call of the wind.

All Rights Reserved©2017 Marquessa Matthews.

Disclaimer: I have no copyrights to the song and/or video and/or hyperlinks to songs and/or videos directly above. No copyright infringement intended.

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#SongLyricSunday – ” La Negra Tiene Tumbao” – Celia Cruz #musicchallenge #music

If you want to join in and have some fun with Song Lyric Sunday, click link below.

This week’s Song Lyric Sunday Theme: Bragging is hosted by Helen at “This Thing Called Life One Word at a Time“.

I will admit that this week’s Bragging theme was challenging. I mean, what songs in my music collection speak to “bragging” or even really refer to “bragging”? The closest thing I could thing of was Celia Cruz singing about a woman who has got style, knows it and who is not afraid to flaunt it.

That could be a form of “bragging”, right?

Though it’s in Spanish, you won’t need a translation to understand.

*Warning, the video below has partial glittery gold nudity*

Enjoy!

Esa negrita que va caminando
Esa negrita tiene su tumbao
Y cuando la gente la va mirando
Ella baila de lao va bien apretao

(partial lyrics)

Songwriters: Fernando Osorio, Sergio George

Lyrics found at SongLyrics.com

Disclaimer: I have no copyrights to the song and/or video and/or hyperlinks to songs and/or videos and/or gifs above. No copyright infringement intended.

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“The Midnight Hour” #marquessachallenge #fictionfriday

Note: This was written for yesterday’s #FictionFriday Challenge

If you want to join this challenge, click here.

My heart raced as I stood in his doorway ready to bare my soul and tell him what I wanted.

“What are you doing here at this hour?”

I half-expected Ty to shut me down after all that had happened. He ran both hands through his messy hair and then folded his arms across his white T-shirt looking groggy from my midnight appearance at his door. He looked less than pleased to see me but his face softened when his brows furrowed with concern.

“What’s wrong Laney?”

I took a deep breath and steeled myself against turning around and running away.

“One night. With you. As more than friends,” I said with as much confidence as I could muster.

Ty’s grogginess was instantly replaced by a stunned look that made my stomach flip in the most uncomfortable of ways.

What?!

“One night of you and me being more than just friends is what you said you wanted.”

It was easier for me to get the words out the second time around and I found myself brushing past him into his apartment. Ty continued to stand dumbfounded with his hand still firmly on the door knob.

“Wait…what? That was weeks ago and I was…I was joking around Laney. And I was drunk…”

“You know that’s not true Ty.”

He stared down at me as if I had completely lost her mind, not knowing what to say but knowing that he was lying.

“Your exact words were that you didn’t want to have sex with me but that you wanted to make love to me, just for one night. That’s what you said. That’s why I’m here. That’s what I want from you right now.”

Before Ty could say another word, I shut the front door for him, took him by the hand and led him into his bedroom. Once we were standing next to the bed, I waited for my request to fully sink in for him and when it did, I reached for both of his hands and placed them on my hips. He shook his head.

“Laney…I shouldn’t…I mean, we can’t…”

“Ty, I’m giving you what you asked for. The question now is, will you shut up and put your money where your mouth is?”

The words tumbled from my mouth like they belonged to someone else.

In an instant, Tyler tilted his head to meet my lips. As we kissed, I knew that he would question me in the morning about why I had turned up at his door. But in that moment, burning every last detail of our togetherness into my memory was the only thing that was important to me because in the morning after we talked, Ty would hate me forever.

All Rights Reserved ©2017 Marquessa Matthews

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#MondayBlogs – “Suns and Lovers” #fiction @mondayblogs #amwriting

A woman finally finds a real man at the wrong time in her life…

“Suns and Lovers”

His long lashes tickle my stomach as he plants soft kisses around my navel. Then, he lays his cheek against my sandy stomach and I run my fingers through his wet hair.

Just when I think that life can’t get any better, it simply does with this man.

For now.

The sun is gone, the darkness begins to take over and the mosquitos buzz around our half-naked bodies. I don’t want them to feast on us but it feels so good just laying together like the other lovers on the beach. I don’t want to move and neither does he.

He tilts his head and looks at me, saying nothing but everything with those dark eyes that made me fall for him in the first place. Everything is effortless with him and it’s going to hurt like hell when things fall apart. He smiles at me like he’s got a secret.

“What?”

His smile widens as he raises himself up to face me.

“I’m smiling because…”

He runs his palm across my stomach and I squirm from being ticklish. I place my hand on top of his to make him stop.

“Because what?”

“I’m thinking how cute our babies will be. I wouldn’t mind a little girl who looks just like you first. I could have two girls to spoil rotten for a while. Then, we could have a son.”

It takes me a few seconds to process his words and when I do, I don’t know what to say. I sit up, making his hand tumble away from my skin.

We’ve never discussed babies or even marriage. All I know is that I’m perfectly imperfect and could never fit into his world just as he could never fit into mine.

If I could only go back to the day before I met him…I would have done things differently.

If only I had kept my word to never give love one last chance…I’d feel safer.

“Of course, I’d have to make an honest woman out of you and we’d have to get married first.”

I still can’t speak and his eyes laugh knowing that he has caught me by surprise.

“So what do you say to marrying me so that we can live happily ever after and make some beautiful babies?”

My heart stops as I watch him reach deep into our beach bag and pull out a small jewelry box. After all the years I’d spent swimming in a sea of boys, I’d finally found myself a good man.

And now, I have to say no.

All Rights Reserved ©2017 Marquessa Matthews.

#SongLyricSunday – “Cruisin’” – Smokey Robinson and the Miracles #musicchallenge #music

If you want to join in and have some fun with Song Lyric Sunday, click link below.

This week’s Song Lyric Sunday Theme: Traveling is hosted by Helen at “This Thing Called Life One Word at a Time“.

Picture this:

A cute little convertible. A warm summer day. The sun shining down on you and a good-looking guy at your side on an impromptu weekend road trip to it-doesn’t-matter-where. His hand resting on your thigh as you cruise together down the highway with this song on the radio.

Now press play, close your eyes and cruise with me Baby…

Baby tonight belongs to us
Every thing’s right, do what you must
And inch by inch we get closer and closer
To every little part of each other ooh baby, yeah

(partial lyrics)

Songwriters: Marvin Tarplin, Smokey Robinson

Lyrics found at MetroLyrics

Disclaimer: I have no copyrights to the song and/or video and/or hyperlinks to songs and/or videos and/or gifs above. No copyright infringement intended.

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“Ripple Effect” #marquessachallenge #fictionfriday

Note: This was written for yesterday’s #FictionFriday Challenge.

*Trigger warning – fiction alludes to sexual abuse/child abuse*

If you want to join this challenge, click here.

My younger brother, Don and I sat next to each other on the couch in our parent’s living room. It was their 55th wedding anniversary and the entire extended family had turned out for the casual BBQ party they had decided to throw themselves. People milled around, some catching up on the latest family news while others boasted about their fabulous accomplishments to make each other jealous.

I had been all around the world but whenever I visited my childhood house, the only place I wanted to be was away from here. That’s when I longed for the safe confines of my own peaceful and comforting home.

The entire gathering was ridiculously hypocritical seeing that our parent’s entire marriage had only been full of hateful tolerance instead of wedded bliss. Don and I had endured that charade our entire lives behind their closed doors and we knew their dirty secret.

“I blame you David.”

My plate of homemade macaroni and cheese and barbecue ribs sitting precariously on my lap almost fell between my knees at Don’s angry voice.

“Blame me? For what? What did I ever do to you?!”

Over the years, we had rarely seen each other but it wasn’t for my lack of trying to make an effort. Don had been the one to distance himself and his family away from me. Our disconnect had slowly started after I had eloped at eighteen to marry my first wife, a calculated move far out of state that had more to do with escaping the smothering environment than being head over heels in love. Unfortunately, leaving town had also meant leaving Don behind to fend for himself.

“I blame you for her.”

Don pointed to the bay window to where Uncle Alonso and Aunt Beatrice stood in the front garden area chatting up a storm with our parents. My blood ran cold with nausea.

“What are they doing here?” I found myself saying much too loud.

How dare they have the audacity to even show their faces here?

The urge to run to the bathroom and throw up quickly turned into an overwhelming desire to jump into my car and run them both over.

No, maybe run all four of them over.

Deader than dead.

“If you had spoken up back then, she never would have come after me after you left. My life would have been so different if you had just fought back. But you were always the selfish one, weren’t you?”

Don pushed himself up from the couch and walked away, leaving me to deal with the fallout of the bomb he had dropped.

She had done things to him too?

Cold sweat racked my body as my soul emptied itself onto the carpet alongside the contents of my plate. My soul hadn’t felt so empty since the first time Uncle Alonso had begged me not to tell on Aunt Bea, almost as empty as when my parents had refused to believe me when I had finally spoken my truth.

I could still almost feel the pain of the beating I had received for it.

Bloody little liar! That’s my sister you’re talking about! Bea would never do such a thing! Don’t you ever say anything like that again!

Oblivious to the frenzied scene of aunts and girl cousins trying to clean up the ribs and macaroni decorating my mother’s precious Siberian white rug, I was on my feet in an instant.

As I barreled my way out of the front door to where they stood jabbering away, my hand searched frantically in the depths of my pockets for my car keys.

There was no time like the present…

All Rights Reserved ©2017 Marquessa Matthews.

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#SongLyricSunday – “You’re Makin’ Me High” – Toni Braxton #musicchallenge #music

If you want to join in and have some fun with Song Lyric Sunday, click link below.

This week’s Song Lyric Sunday Theme: Self-Love is hosted by Helen at “This Thing Called Life One Word at a Time“.

The lyrics of Toni Braxton’s “You’re Making’ Me High” was a no brainer for this theme.

Enjoy the video!

I’ll always think of you
Inside of my private thoughts
I can imagine you
Touching my private parts
With just the thought of you
I can’t help but touch my self
That’s why I want you so bad
Just one night of
Moonlights, with you there beside me
All night, doin’ it again and again
You know I want you so bad…

(partial lyrics)

Songwriters: Brice Wilson, Kenneth Edmonds, Toni Braxton

Copyright © A Side Music LLC D/B/A Modern Works Music Publishing

Lyrics found at Google Play Music

Disclaimer: I have no copyrights to the song and/or video and/or hyperlinks to songs and/or videos and/or gifs above. No copyright infringement intended.

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