“Material Girl” @kegarland #selflove #selfworth



I’ve been following Dr. KE Garland’s “How Do You Love Yourself” February series and love it! The graphic you see to the left is one of her lovely “kwotes”!

The daily tidbits she’s been sharing are quite inspiring. You should check it out!

The posts have made me realize just how important self-care is and how we need to take care of ourselves, even when it involves the purchase of certain material things.

Though I truly dislike shopping, I finally bit the bullet and shopped for “things I need right now” list. Mind you, these were not impulse purchases – I had budgeted for them.

It costs a pretty penny but it is so warm!


-30C waterproof boots


A new cell and laptop that don’t shut off on their own all the time…

These purchases didn’t take a lot of time so I was procrastinating for nothing. Now I feel lighter about checking them off my list.

What have you been doing to take care of yourself?

M  xoxo



A New ‘Do #saturdaycoffeeshare #blackgirlmagic

Totally frivolous and random post…

With the crazy cold weather, it’s hard keeping my hair healthy so as a short term fix, I’ve decided to get a new ‘do for the next few weeks.

Braids or twists.

I haven’t really done braids since I was a kid when my mother managed my mane and now that I’m looking around online….when did all these pretty style options pop up?

Making a decision as a Libra is like pulling teeth but I’m leaning towards one of these below.

Which one do you think will look the cutest when I pull off my winter tuque, eh?

(Post update: option 2 to the top far right was my pick)

(images/photos found at and credited to https://therighthairstyles.com/30-best-black-braided-hairst/20/)

Disclaimer: I have no copyrights to the images/photos above. No copyright infringement intended.

When It’s My Jam I Don’t Give A Damn  #selfFULL #tuesdaythoughts

I’m reposting this for you lovelies who would like to get to know me a little better.


Marquessa xoxo


(updated version of previous post)

The older I get, the less I care about being embarrassed.

Maybe you feel the same way.

Like singing along to one of my favorite cassette’s in the car (windows closed, of course), head bopping to the music, committed to getting the lyrics right and throwing in a few hand gestures to the beat for good measure.

Totally in the zone.

This time around, it was to “Como La Flor” from my Selena “Dreaming of You” cassette. No, not Justin Bieber’s “Selena”, but the original Selena whose life was cut short in the mid-90s. And before you ask, “yes” my car has a cassette player (as it should since it’s almost 20 years old).

So when I looked over to see the passengers in the next car staring me down because they had caught me in full mid-chorus, I wasn’t surprised that they were laughing at me. They were just waiting for me to look away and die of embarrassment.

Uh…that wasn’t happening.

Instead, I didn’t miss a beat and continued singing AT them with Selena-like flamenco hands…

Como la flor
Con tanto amor
Me diste tú
Se marchitó
Me marcho hoy
Yo sé perder
Ay ay ay, cómo me duele

Funny how their smirks transformed into confusion and how quickly they were no longer interested in the weird lady in the next lane…

All Rights Reserved ©2018 Marquessa Matthews.

Disclaimer: I have no copyrights to the song and/or video and/or hyperlinks to songs and/or videos and/or gifs above. No copyright infringement intended.


Behaviour Never Lies #life #race

credit and found at: http://www.hypeorlando.com/growing-up-millennial/2014/06/01/three-things-maya-angelou-taught-me/

It has become a wild and crazy world.

Where hateful words, malicious behavior and utter foolishness have somehow become commonplace, tolerated and accepted.

Where a mélange of power and ignorance can have a sickening ripple effect on the rest of the world.

Where the covert underbelly sits back and nourishes themselves on the chaos and dark energy.

But the fact remains that behaviour never lies.

And no amount of power and expensively purchased education can outweigh intelligence, love for others and class.

M  xoxo

Baby It’s Cold Outside… #montreal

We’re going through a deep, deep freeze spell right now.

The -39 degrees Celcius weather (yes, that is a minus before the 38) we are having will continue until next week. I’ve been totally boring on my Instagram feed by posting snapshots like the one below to show just how crazy cold it is. The kind of cold where you have to keep a tap running in the house to make sure that the pipes don’t freeze.

This was Thursday’s “Real Feel”…

But as “Canucks”, we take it in stride and just keep moving. It got me thinking about how we behave when dealing with extreme cold events, at least for us Canadians.

Here are a few things hat come to mind:

  • You talk about the weather around the water cooler at work. At length. The weather really is a topic of conversation for us;
  • Your mother calls to ask you if you’re wearing the long johns she gave you at Christmas and you don’t have to lie (because you really are wearing them). You’ve also started wearing those ugly ass mittens and hat that clash with your style because they are warmer than your “prettier” pair;
  • You walk on the outer part of the sidewalk to avoid falling icicles from highrise buildings which can become daggers from the sky (I could tell you a story about that!);
  • When you say that you’re going to “plug in” your car overnight, you don’t need to explain what that means;
  • Your employer sends out an email reminding you to stay warm, “do the penguin walk” and tells you “how to fall” if it’s icy.

As you can guess, lots of us are staying in, working from home and limiting the outdoor activities. In fact, a number of outdoor New Year’s Eve events have already been cancelled!

Tell me, how cold does it get in your neck of the woods? And what do you do when you’re forced to stay indoors for extended periods of time?


M  xoxo

Blue Christmas #weekendcoffeeshare #christmas #life

The decorations used to be perfectly placed and the Christmas tree ready to light on Dec 1.

Maybe too early for you but I’ve always preferred to “slow decorate” and enjoy the “Christmas feeling” for an entire month, remembering those warm and fuzzy times as a kid when I could spend hours sitting at the foot of the family tree to watch the lights dance and figure out how those 1970s “bubble lights” worked (remember those?). And if it happened to be snowing outside our family’s living room bay window while I sat there reading Louisa May Alcott’s “Little Women” for the upteenth time, it was almost like Christmas heaven.

But this year, I seem to have lost that “Christmas” feeling.

I have yet to hang up one decoration or pull the Christmas tree out of the garage and I’m not sure that I will.

Instead of thinking about the relaxed holiday pace and the wonderful times to come with family and friends, my thoughts keep drifting to things I can’t control.  Worrying about things that haven’t happened, may not happen for a long time and who may not be around next Christmas.

So no, I’m not feeling the Christmas spirit. It’s more of a bah humbug mood that will hopefully disappear in the next few days.

What kind of Christmas mood are YOU in?

M  xoxo

#ThoughtfulTuesday: Being The Brave You Is Beautiful

I would love to be beautiful.

But not just any kind of beautiful.

The kind of “beautiful” that Tracee Ellis Ross spoke to in her recent Glamour Women of the Year 2017 speech .

The kind of “beautiful” that reflects being myself 150% of the time, not allowing others to dull my shine, resisting the pull to fit myself into other people’s molds and fully stepping into my own energy.

I’m a work in progress.

M  xoxo

Note: I can count the number of celebrities I follow on Instagram one hand with three fingers to spare but Tracee Ellis Ross is one of the few that I do follow. She strikes me as the kind of person I would love to sit down and have a coffee with.

©2017 Marquessa Matthews. All Rights Reserved